Dear Chickens,
I know that it's winter and it's dark and miserable, and I know that at least one of you is peri-menopausal and simply not up to producing an egg a day, but it's been five weeks and we have just bought our second half-dozen box in the last four years, and really they aren't the same. Oh yes, and why do you choose to moult in November? It's not the most sensible time to be walking around half-dressed.
Dear Breadmaker,
You are fabulous. You have just produced a lovely loaf made with Dove's Farm Organic Barleycorn Flour, which is stuffed full of good stuff like omega 3 rich linseeds. So why do I feel guilty for using you instead of doing the whole baking bread thing from first principles?
Dear Gavin,
I love the fact that you are watching the rugby (Scotland v Australia) on TV with the sound turned off and have the Radio Scotland commentary on the wind-up radio beside you. My Dad used to do this with the cricket. The pictures really are better on the radio, aren't they? - Not that the commentators are at all biased, perish the very thought.
Dear Judy,
Speaking of cricket, I just wanted to tell you how delighted I am that you have been selected to manage the England Women's Cricket Team on the forthcoming tour to Trinidad and Tobago. We clearly have the edge with a knitter in the squad, the ability to see the completed sweater in your mind's eye play the long game when you have only just chosen the yarn bowled a couple of overs will be very useful. Did the selectors know that you are a knitter when they chose you?
Dear Clouds,
I think we've had enough now thanks.
Dear p/hop,
Are you getting excited about your birthday yet? A little bird tells me you have some rather special presents on the way.
Dear Yarn Club Members,
I hear that parcels are starting to arrive and that you approve of the colourway this month. It's always nerve-wracking sending them out, despite the fact that I've been posting Club parcels for more than three years. Thank you for having confidence in me.
Love, n.